Fear is Gray

Have you ever found yourself afraid of something and no matter how much logic was spoken to it or how much you dealt with it, it never really went away? So often we think of fear as black or white. You are afraid or not afraid. The fear is what it presents itself as, nothing hidden.

When I was a kid, I found myself afraid of so many things. I would hear and see things in my room and around my room at night. Often I was too afraid to sleep. When I did sleep I would have nightmares. I was afraid of being weak, physically and emotionally. We tried to explain every fear away, but none of the explanations worked, so I continued to fear.

The explanations never worked because we never got to the root of any of the issues.

Continue reading “Fear is Gray”

ABC For You And Me

I wanted to do something different today, something fun. What’s more fun than hearing my inner thoughts?

A to Z Survey

A – Age: 33.

B – Biggest Fear: Missing it. Failing my kids.

C – Clock: 12:09 AM.

D – Drink You Had Last: Water; technically salt water, but I didn’t swallow that. Continue reading “ABC For You And Me”

The Day Every Mother Loves to Hate

Here I sit on a Tuesday night thoroughly exhausted and unable to have a coherent thought after my oldest’s first day of school. I sent my first child to her first day of first grade; there’s something I’ll never be able to say again.

The exhaustion is more mental than physical, I’m sure. I mean, yes, I forgot about all the pesky BTS shopping until yesterday (we had just gotten back from a week long vacation, don’t judge) so we spent hours frantically walking around trying to get the perfect items. Yes, I probably did get everything on the list (including the teacher’s wish list) in an effort to not be one of those moms. And yes, I did stay up way too late manually sharpening 50 number two pencils, eventually popping the burn blister on my index finger. I have to say, I don’t think saving those extra pennies on non sharpened pencils (or an electric sharpener) was worth it. I still can’t feel every part of that finger. Continue reading “The Day Every Mother Loves to Hate”

Get Her a Cape

Mothers are a wonder. They’re a work in progress like the rest of humanity, but they’re a wonder nonetheless. Have you ever watched them with their families? I don’t mean in a creepy, call the cops and get a restraining order kind of way; I mean a casual observance. It’s one of my favorite things to do. I like people watching, but there’s something about seeing a mother be a mother that’s stirring. Continue reading “Get Her a Cape”

It’s Just The Business Of Life

In case you haven’t noticed, I’ve gone from writing three times a week to two. I find that being wiped out doesn’t lend itself to much creativity. The last few weeks of August are always the hardest of the summer for us, too. We have our anniversary, kid’s birthdays, back to school and end of summer vacations; it’s hectic. Aside from that, I’m not witty enough during the last month of summer to do more than two a week.

Business is a season that every person goes through, especially parents. As our kids get older our lives get crazier. We try to come up with more and newer things to do with them and to do themselves. We’re in competition with ourselves to be better than we were the year before and the year before that. Continue reading “It’s Just The Business Of Life”

The Parent Games

Being home alone with two young kids who aren’t allowed to watch anything but the Olympics for its duration is bound to inspire. If you think about it, there’s not much difference between being a parent and being an Olympian.

Whether Olympian or parent, some days really are about who is faster and/or stronger. Both feel the bewilderment of being ahead right up to the very end when victory is taken out from underneath them. Both require constant training, although, parents have you beat time wise, Olympians. Continue reading “The Parent Games”

There Goes All That Summer Progress

In our house, the Olympics have virtually taken over our lives. I’m the sports fanatic in the family, but even my husband has been watching them. I’m choosing to believe it’s the magic of the games and not because I won’t let anyone change the channel(s).

Even our girls are getting into it. They studiously watch all the events and in the middle decide to try it out for themselves. Watching them do diving on our living room floor may be my new favorite thing. While watching a Walsh-Jennings/Ross beach volleyball match, my 2 YO yelled, “No, swimming. I want the swimming, peas!” Continue reading “There Goes All That Summer Progress”

What is a sick day?

Being sick is so much different for a parent. We have tiny people to keep alive whether we’re ill or not. We have to make sure our kids get fed and clothed and bandaged if needed. We don’t get to beg off or go lay down. If we did, we couldn’t be sure the house would still be intact when we got up. We don’t get sick days.

Sure, we know what a sick day is. Those are the days when you can’t remember how to tie your kid’s shoes the right way because your head is somewhere up by the ceiling. They’re the days you’re too weak to lift or do anything so you make your children your goafers. They’re the days you give directives from your bed because your eyes are being forced out of your skull.  They’re the days you feel sick but keep going.

I can’t say mothers are the only ones who don’t get to tag out when they’re sick. It feels like the internet is filled with blogs and articles about how moms never get a break or moms are on call 24 hours a day, but every house is different and some have stay at home dads. They feel the torture just as much as SAHMs. I want you to know I perfectly understand that before I tell you that’s not how it is in my house. Continue reading “What is a sick day?”

6 Things Gilmore Girls Taught Me About Parenting

I haven’t been shy about my love of coffee or sleep or being a mom, but I’ve downplayed my love of Gilmore Girls. It’s probably the only show I’ll never get enough of. About once a year I watch all seven seasons back to back. When season seven started, a group of us got together to watch the premiere. We made the strongest espresso known to man, bought donuts, pizza, Twizzlers, french fries, burgers and Doritos. The seven of us could only eat half of it, but the pain was worth it. At the end of season seven (the final episode of the final season), I cried. Continue reading “6 Things Gilmore Girls Taught Me About Parenting”

Things Are A Changin’

This week, I announced I was going to choose joy and get out of the negative. I wanted and needed a change. Who knew all it took was a little action on my part to get it?

For you parents just entering the “I’m out” stage of summer, I found some hope for you. For those parents who’ve been in that stage since June 1, I have relief for you too. Pour yourself a small glass of wine, relax and prepare for good news.

First and foremost, just remember: there are only four weeks left of summer vacation. You’ve already made it through eight, these last four should blow right past you! Not as satisfying as you wanted, is it?

Save some of that wine, I have more to say. Continue reading “Things Are A Changin’”